Alex Steelsmith
"You and your partner are each a part of one another, as surely as the word part is a part of the word partners . . . Your two immune systems become joined at the hip; they uphold one another, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health."

          "As a woman, you know that love, intimacy, and sex are all about relationship and partnership. You may feel, at times, that you and your partner are each a part of one another, as surely as the word part is a part of the word partners. Successful partners, by definition, are joined together, complement each other, share deeply, and in some sense complete one another.
          "During an intimate relationship, your sexual health and your partner's merge, with your two sexual energies closely united. If his libido is healthy, it can benefit your own immeasurably. As you've seen, your sexual energy flourishes in the presence of healthy male sexuality . . . On the other hand, if his libido is out of balance, it can affect yours in countless ways.
          "Just as your partner's sexual well-being promotes your own, so too can his overall health shape yours. If he's thriving in body, mind, and spirit, you're more likely to be in that state as well, but if his health is compromised, it can have numerous repercussions for you. In a sense, your two immune systems become joined at the hip; they uphold one another, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health.
          "In a long-term intimate relationship, enhancing your partner's health and sexual well-being enhances yours, and vice versa; vitality is reciprocity, sexuality is mutuality, and sensuality is cosensuality . . .
          "The idea that sexual partners physically and spiritually complement and complete one another was well known to practitioners of ancient Chinese medicine, which was built on the balance of opposites: feminine and masculine, water and fire, darkness and light, inwardness and outwardness, yin and yang
          . . . If you've achieved a truly balanced partnership, you and your partner can be seen as two halves of one whole, each intimately affecting the other and in close harmony, like the two interlocking shapes of the yin-yang symbol.
          " . . . For some couples, the tantric practices in the previous chapter can be especially helpful in synchronizing their sexual tempos. And simply being aware of the differences between women's and men's yin and yang sexual energies brings you closer, strengthens your relationship, and generally engenders harmony between genders."
-From pages 207-209 of Great Sex, Naturally

          "It's no small irony that many cases of ED are caused by side effects of prescription drugs, yet met with more of the same. If side effects of one drug are 'treated' by another with new side effects, at what point will the cycle end?"
-From pages 220-221 of Great Sex, Naturally

"At times, leisure is the measure of pleasure."

          "A man who has ED is often a driven, goal-oriented individual who overstresses his system. The only thing he may not be driven to achieve is the state of relaxation necessary to regenerate his health and libido. When faced with ED, he may become even more focused on achievement elsewhere in his life and even less able to relax and relieve stress. It may be crucial for him to break out of this negative feedback loop and rediscover the value of taking time off for activities that aren't achievement related . . . Most of all he needs to forget about his worldly concerns, relax, and completely let go of the 'fight' for a few hours every now and then. He may be surprised by how much this can affect his ability to enjoy sex again; some men are amazed to discover the degree to which, at times, leisure is the measure of pleasure.
          "Some men with lifestyle-induced ED have lost sight of the simple joys of play and gleefulness. They may be out of touch with the hidden connections between sexuality and whimsicality, sensuality and impracticality, the erotic and the quixotic. Often men in this category need to remember how to discover the important links between fully enjoying life and being sexually functional-how to find the 'fun' in functional."
-From pages 222-223 of Great Sex, Naturally

          "Late Sex, Naturally; Pleasure and Older Couples:
          "Studies show that the primary reasons older couples stop being sexually active are poor health and a tendency to simply lose interest in sex . . . Who are 'older' couples? By some definitions you qualify if you're over 60, but as the saying goes, you're only as old as you feel. If you consistently follow the lifestyle recommendations earlier in this book, you could vastly increase your likelihood of being sexually active in your 60s; your overall health can be the single most important factor in your ability to keep the sex in sexagenarian.
          "If you're 70 or older, the pleasures and health benefits of sex can still be yours. Research shows that about seven out of ten couples enjoy sex in their 70s, and some well into their 80s. Again, being especially vigilant about your health can make all the difference; the higher your age, the more your cumulative lifestyle choices may determine your potential to enjoy being sexually active. In your golden years, great health is invaluable, and wise choices can yield particularly rich rewards for your ability to savor the treasure of pleasure."
-From page 232 of Great Sex, Naturally

"Your overall health can be the single most important factor in your ability to keep the sex in sexagenarian."

          "Nurturing his sexual nature nurtures your own-but setbacks to his sexual health can affect every part of your partnership. At the same time, your sexual well-being is equally important to his; the closer you grow as intimate partners, the more reciprocal your sexual energies become. A truly intimate relationship gives you the greatest possible balance of give-and-take-intimate partnership is ultimate partnership-and allows you to continuously co-create your sexual vitality. By upholding each other's well-being as you evolve together through the transitions in your lives, you can generate dynamic, radiant health for your shared sexuality."
-From pages 249-250 of Great Sex, Naturally

<< More from Great Sex, Naturally